Is This P Word Holding You Back From Having Your Best Body?

Posted by on September 23, 2016 in Blog Posts | 2 comments

49th_birthdayI haven’t written in a while. I’d think of something to share and then another and because I wanted to share THE perfect thing, I ended up sharing nothing. Yet, I’m committed to helping you reach your goals.

I’ve been working on letting go of my PERFECTIONISTIC tendancies and healing is always better in community, so here’s my share. I hope it serves you.

I believed I needed to be perfect to be loved. I grew up in a household where critisism buzzed around like mosquitos in summer. It was used in an attempt to help me. It didn’t, it squashed my self confidence and put me on the defensive. I started my quest for perfection and it hasn’t completely left.

With the help of a very wise mentor, I let go of the need to be physically perfect. My food and weight obsession resolved. But years later, whenever I wasn’t loving myself and trying to be perfect, I would gain weight.

I wanted to be a perfect student, perfect employee, perfect practitioner, etc. I’m over it, it never served me and has the potential to keep me from serving you. All this pursuit does is thwart my life energy and squelch my true nature. Then I’m not showing up and being myself in the world, I’m striving for acceptance outside myself. I’m over that, I want to serve, I want to be happy and I can’t do either if I’m pursuing perfection.

So, I’m letting go of the pursuit and I’m just going to be perfectly me, flaws and all.

It’s been over a year since I hosted the first Love Your Body Challenge. Hundreds of women and a few brave men participated over the following months. Lives were transformed, I loved it and got great feedback.

I’d like to offer another one, and invite you to participate. It’s free.

You might be wondering why loving your body is important? You may think you’ll start loving your body when it’s the perfect weight or when you get control of your cravings. I get that, I’ve been there!

You may even think that it will be easy to love your body when you lose weight, but it’s the other way around.

Love is imporant, because it’s the long term answer to your food and weight issues and it’s also the antidote to perfectionism and pain.You can eat the perfect food, do the perfect exercise, but if you don’t let go of the self critisim and the pursuit of perfection, progress won’t stick long term.

So, my questions for you are:

1 – Is letting go of perfection, so you can finally feel comfortable in your own skin important to you?

2 – Do you see the value of accepting yourself just the way you are so you can then make positive change?

3 – Do you want to let go of the negative body image thoughts looping in your head?

4 – What does your heart desire?

Post and answer any one or all of these questions below in the comments, or add your own. I’ll design a free challenge based on your responses.
I want and need your honest feedback, so please take a risk and share. I will not judge you, I promise.

Thank you for reading, and please know that I am always learning and growing from my mistakes and I’m now more comitted than ever to serve you with heart, not perfection. That’s what’s perfect for me.

What’s perfect for you?

Much Love,


ps. That photo is of me being silly on my 49th birthday :-)


  1. Hi Kara, this post has really resonated with me. I DO want to stop the negative body image thoughts, but these perfectionist tendencies run deep and have been around for a very long time. It’s so hard to change. I think I’ve resigned to always resenting my body. My heart desires to be happy and free. I want to look at food and not feel tortured by it. I’ve often wondered where these desires for perfectionism come from and thanks to your post, I think I partially know. But when a person lets go of perfectionism….I have no idea what that is like! How does that feel? I don’t know how to do it. How do I let those tendencies go? Thank you!

    • Hi Danielle,

      Thank you for commenting me and letting me know this post resonated with you. I totally get it about the negative body image and perfectionistic tendencies and not knowing what it would be like without all of that.

      It can feel like this run deep, yet once you’re aware of them, it’s much easier to shift, so that’s the good news for you. I’ll share some ideas for you below:

      In addition to the techniques I share with clients, which can help transform the root causes, you can start focusing on what’s good about you and your body today. This can be a focus of what parts of your body you CAN appreciate, even if it’s something functional that you’re grateful for that keeps you alive, like breathing or digestion. It can also be something about what you did or said that was loving, kind or intelligent. Reminding yourself to focus on something positive about you or your body several times throughout the day, can start to shift the mental habits that run you down and deplete your vitality.

      The other thing that can be helpful is to catch yourself each time you find yourself judging yourself and choose a different thought. See your thoughts like they were somebody else’s, not yours. I encourage clients to choose the opposite thought, even if it feels untrue and far fetched. This can help break up the mental pattern. Over time, this will work, and there are ways to go deeper, so you don’t have to keep practicing.

      I do have a community called the Love Your Body Lifestyle™ that I’d like to invite you to. It’s free and it’s on Facebook and we support each other in learning to listen to and appreciate our bodies as a way of transforming our experience of our bodies. You can join here:

      And to answer your question about what it’s like and how it feels, it feels like finding an old friend and realizing she was there supporting you all along the way, it just didn’t look or feel like it. It’s like coming home.

      Let me know if this is helpful and feel free to sign up for a Breakthrough Session on my website here if you’d like to experience it first hand:

      All the best,


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